Tuesday, July 24, 2007

A smile . . .& a recipe . . . (or The Existential Sandwich)

relives a heart that grieves. remember what I've said. (mick jagger)

BRILLIANT! Best sandwich ever! PBL&T! Peanutbutter, bacon, lettuce and tomato on white tOAST! (sorry caps lock left on) Masterfully put together by a friend/coworker of mine appropriately named Hope. BRILLIANT!

These clowns at subway talk in their ads about sandwich artists. Like art makes sense, or is useful. Fuckers.

(not the PBL&T) Recipe:
Take four slices of white bread, toss them in the trash. Now find a bakery that sells "army bread" , , ,good luck, I've yet to find one that still does in Scranton. Fish the four slices of white bread out of the trash and substitute them for the army bread. If you haven't already, turn on the Sabbath. or the Ramones. or the Durans. Melt a stick of butter and drizzled over the other 2 slices of bread. Dice lettuce, tomato, cilantro, and rosemary and spread over the melted butter. Before you take a much needed break, fill in the blanks with what you'd like to see in the sandwich. You'll be eating it, right?

Now change bread.


This sandwich will at all costs be crunchy. The inner part of each slice will be lined with rippled potato chips. Toss the lettuce tomato etc. concoction in the trash. Take the remaining bread and whatever else is left and put it in your pocket. Pour milk in your pocket. Put a spoon in your back pocket. Cup your left hand and pour orange juice in it and head for the front door. Crumple newspaper and put it in your pocket. Walk away from your house with no money and don't come back until you've eaten and drunk everything in your possession, including the newspaper. Now wait 28 hours and drink only hose water you steal from your neighbors. Once you're home lay down in the front yard with your eyes closed until the neighbors call the cops.

you know i'm right.

(legal footnote, it's your front yard, you can do what ever you damn well please. notify your lawyer before making the sandwich though. pigs will be pigs, right?)

Heavy like Mount Kailash.

1 comment:

Roni said...

How come this sounds like a dig at me? ;~)